Thursday, 15 June 2017

The Perfect Cover

Hi all,

The book content is nearly finalised. The next step will be to design the perfect cover that will make you so intrigued by the book you won't be able to not pick it up and buy it just so you can look within.

You have followed me on this journey so far. What do you think would be the perfect design for the cover of Holding The Baby Dream?

Please send your comments, thoughts and design ideas to me if you feel guided to.


Narelle Hudson

Saturday, 20 May 2017

The end is Nigh

Yes, I am aware there has been another big gap between posts. Life has been very hectic, with some doors closing and other doors opening. I have left my job and started two new ones. There is always apprehension in starting anything new and a human fear that you won't be as skilful as you need to be, to start with. It is silly really to expect so much from oneself. How could we expect to be skilful straight away when we are starting a new role.

There has also been apprehension in finishing a job I started a long time ago. Although I believe when the timing is right all things started are completed. The timing is now perfect.  My book: 'Holding the Baby Dream', commenced more than 7 years ago was completed and sent to my editor late last year. The changes needed, after my editor had read it, were meant to be completed by January or February this year. A holiday to China did delay things and then everyday life got in the way.

The editing changes were almost completed last Sunday on Mothers Day, which also coincided with my son's 7th Birthday. Twelve long hours were spent on Mother's Day doing a final read through and edit. Last night a few more changes were made, a few minor things I had been too exhausted to do clearly at the end of my twelve hour editing day, the week before. I had wanted to save these last changes until I was fresh and last night was the night.

The book you have all been waiting to read is now back with my editor again for a final copy edit. It is sometimes impossible to rush things, as much as we would like to. I believe this book is worth the wait and I can't wait to share it will my husband first; who has been waiting for this book to be ready for his eyes for many years. He has only heard me talking about the book and seen me disappear to write it; but has not read a word of it in over 7 years.

I am sure he is as apprehensive as all of you about the content, if not more so, because it is also about him.

I look forward to keeping you posted on the progress and will be the first to let you know how you can get your copy.

Until next time, keep the conversation going.


Narelle Hudson

Friday, 20 January 2017


Happy New Year to all of my loyal followers. I spent three weeks of the holiday season overseas, exploring China so I have not posted for a while.

I love to travel! I find there is nothing like exploring a completely different country, with a unique culture, to help you put life into perspective. Travelling helps me to step back from my day-to-day and appreciate how amazing this world is and how incredible life is. I immerse myself deeply into the culture of the new country I am in and leave all IT devises at home. I find this allows me to not only be physically present but to be there wholly and completely.

I have returned, refreshed and ready for this new year, which seems to be screaming at me that what I have always done is not going to cut it any more. There is a clear message coming to me this year about having confidence in myself and everything I do and fearlessly jumping into new experiences without the caution I may have had last year.

I also believe this year is about timing, as life always is. Just as it was not the right time for my beautiful little boy to come into the world so I could be his earthly mother; it just as clearly has not been time to finish editing my book this week. I had it in my head that the second week after I returned from my holiday was the week to tidy up the finishing touches of my book. Here I am in the early hours of Saturday morning and the editing did not happen. The book is not complete.

Last year I would have been disappointed in myself for not achieving this imaginary deadline. Whereas, this year I am confident knowing the timing simply was not right. I think I have spent so much of my life forcing things to happen by certain deadlines and then being disappointed when things did not eventuate on my schedule. Here is the new me. A much more understanding person, who finally gets it. We cannot always make things happen to our schedule. Even with the strictest organisational skills or the greatest desire. Sometimes the universe has other plans. You see, life is about timing and even the perfect book may not be that well received if the timing is not right.

So, I will continue to await the completion of this book as you do. Knowing everything is on track and going to plan perfectly and not allowing myself to feel any guilt about time. I have been hearing much on the topic of infertility at the moment in the media and amongst the people I meet so I am certain the time is near.

Thank you for your patience. As always feel free to share your story with me.


Narelle Hudson

Wednesday, 14 December 2016

Editing Holding The Baby Dream

This is the last post for 2017. Thank you for following my Blog this year and I hope you all have a lovely Christmas and a great start to the New Year.

'Holding The Baby Dream' has been edited by my professional editor and has now been returned to me. I have spent much time this week making the changes suggested. However, I am going to China for a much deserved holiday next week and the progress on the book will be paused until 2017. I promise you will definitely be able to get your copy early next year.

As I have been revising my manuscript I have found joy in knowing how much I have grown since I began writing this book over six years ago. I have learned so much about myself and gained many new strengths.

Tonight I was disappointed in another's perception of my healing. An old friend gingerly announced she was pregnant. She seemed nervous both to tell me the news and of my reaction. My friend preempted the news with, I completely understand if you don't want to reply to this message.

I am upset this friend does not know me well enough to understand that I totally accept her news and am genuinely happy for her. It has been over six years since we lost our son. Surely after all these years I don't deserve to still be treated with kid gloves, like I may fall apart at any moment. Why would I need the same understanding and compassion now I needed six years ago?

I am not sure why this treatment and assumption angers me. I guess I just see it as another sign that people do not understand how to behave around women who have lost a child.

This inspires me to continue to raise awareness on this topic.

Narelle Hudson

Friday, 18 November 2016

Holding The Baby Dream

Hi everyone. I know there hasn't been a post for a little while but I hope this one is worth the wait! I promised earlier in the year that my book about infertility: 'Holding The Baby Dream' would be finished by the end of the year.

Well...the book is with my editor now and should be edited in the next few weeks. Then I will have to check changes and approve them. Of course after that there will be formatting and a cover to design.

I am throwing a spanner in the works by travelling overseas during the Christmas and New Year period also. So we are not quite there yet but we are on track for early 2017 I think.

Yes. I say 'we' because I know many of you have been on this journey with me for a while now. I appreciate all your support and patience. I thank you for your presence and I am so excited to share my book with you all in the not too distant future.

Love and blessings,

Narelle Hudson

Sunday, 30 October 2016

The conversation! - Ed Sheeran - Small Bump [Official Video] -

Have loved this song ever since I heard it. Yes, I have cried when I have listened to it at times but it is such an important message that needs to be shared.

I have seen how many people have viewed this video and how many comments have been left.

I have read many of the comments. Some relate to the words and compare them to their own similar past experiences, as I do. Others hear the words and compare this experience to a different grief and loss experience they have had. Others do not understand the sentiments behind the words personally but are still moved by the tragedy of the lyrics. Others want to turn the song off because it is too painful. Still others think it is too sad a topic to be shared and it just makes them too sad to listen to it.

There are comments from pregnant women, people who have lost babies and people who are young and have not even entered that phase of their life yet.

All these comments have one thing in common, they have started a conversation about a difficult, taboo topic. I love how music, and all the creative arts open conversations and allow people to heal. This is the dream for my blog/book. I want to start/continue the conversation. I don't have a voice like Ed Sheeran but I am hoping my book will touch you as deeply as this song.


Narelle Hudson.

Thursday, 20 October 2016


I recently got a tattoo.  It consists of my sons tiny footprints, his name and the date of his birth. It is on my shoulder to symbolise the heavy weight I have carried on my shoulders. Being on my shoulder blade I can hide it when I choose and reveal it at other times.
It is strange really. When I told people I was getting a second tattoo they were excited, thinking I was so brave and cool. When they asked what design I was getting and I told them they got a little quieter.
When they asked to see it after it was done I am not sure what they expected. But I am sure it was not what they saw.
They responded with: 'cute little footprints' and then looked confused as they read the name River. I would say that was my son and they were his footprints. Then they would go quiet and walk away or change the subject. Few people asked about my son or my experience.
It is weird how uncomfortable death and pain make other people when they did not even know the person who died.
My family could not understand how the tattoo would not make me sad every time I saw it. For me it makes me smile. I love the memory of you permanently printed on my shoulder. It is just funny others can't always handle seeing it and being reminded.